See also:
- Men who think the barista likes them because they read their name from a cup.
- Men who think they don’t need to tip their waitress and instead leave their number instead.
- Men who expect a happy ending when getting a massage and again, don’t leave a tip when they’re sent away without one.
Is a happy ending on a message like a smiley emoji?
Bless your heart
Auto correct strikes again :)
This feels like a statement that’s definitely true and only counts as satire because nobody has tested it yet
Once again The Onion not being satire.
Hardtimes, they are a similar site and easily confused with the Onion, but let’s give proper credit to the publication.
Tbf, this community is called “The Onion”:-P
The Onion is to satire sites what Nintendo was to consoles for parents and grandparents of the 80s/90s.
I totally understand the reason why there is confusion, and almost didn’t reply because it felt nitpicky. Completely fair.
“Man, she keeps smiling at me. I think she digs me.”
“She just wants your tip”
“That’s OK. I don’t need to go full penetration”
🙄
Anything to keep the hope alive. I know that sentiment well enough.
Hey man, I’ve gotten with some bartenders. That doesn’t make me a dirty Vance fan. For shame!
Nah— no service worker would ever think that JD Vance is interested in them, or anything other than himself
Wooosh
You must have misread.