I experience pretty high levels of gender dysphoria, but I don’t think a formal gender transition (medical, social) makes sense for me. So, I’m trying to enjoy my gender and thus my life more by doing things that are (privately) very gender euphoric for me but don’t significantly lessen my cis-enough-presentation and -privilege. I’m realizing that chastity cages can play a greater role in this.
I remember the first time I bought a cage and tried it out at home. The session ended in disappointment, when I discovered that I could pull out of the cage. My early chastity play was closely linked to dressing up, sexual activities, and fantasy (e.g., permanent chastity, anal only orgasms).
Another discovery and frustration has been the tentative conclusion that I can’t fully come from anal stimulation and may not ever be able to. Right now, I don’t have much desire to perform another test of 3 weeks of penile abstinence and endure the psychological frustration that comes with it in pursuit of the elusive full anal orgasm.
My new mantra is “chastity is just clothing,” meaning that I want it to be a part of my daily life and routine that is purposeful and not really sexual. Because I really like aspects of chastity. I find putting a cage on for some reason instantly feminizes my posture and gait a bit. Not feeling a dangle or erection between my legs and having a cage on to advertise that I’m bottom-only is a positive affirmation of my true self that makes both looking at porn and simply being out in public in real life more fulfilling. Riding a dildo is also more fun while locked. I haven’t tried this yet, but chastity augmenting submissive dynamics with a keyholder sounds like lots of fun.
I can pretty comfortably stay locked for 12 hours with my current cage, and this period can align pretty well with getting ready in the morning and getting ready for bed. So, I’m going to keep doing that with an eye to maybe get another cage and/or experiment with taking a break during the day and getting into overnight wear
That’s a good idea - I should change at the gym so guys can see my shaved body and my female athletic wear. I haven’t been to a gym in years, but I have access to one at my community college.
I hear that “gaydar” is a thing, but unfortunately it’s a thing I don’t have. It took me 6 months to work up the courage to ask a coworker if he was “queer in any capacity”. He answered the question with a yes, and he gave me this look like “what, you didn’t know?” He could be a transman for all I know, I’m just that dense. And it makes me think that other guys like me are equally dense and have no idea that I’m queer, which is a problem that I’d like to solve visually in a way that conveys as much information as possible. It’s good that you at least feel like a bottom. I personally would like to try wearing a buttplug at work (not that communicates anything).